Wait! I Thought I Was Safe!

Walking down the damp leaf strewn path, the wind blowing the hair off my shoulder, I let the rain slip through my fingers. Clinging the coat tighter to my body, I reached the mountain end, my get away that overlooked the city. Sitting on the metal bench a shiver ran down my spine, the cold, bone chilling. Leaning forward I took out my hands from the warm confines of my jacket. I watched the rain hitting harder and red near my feet mixing with muddy water falling off the cliff. Turning my hands in the air I let the blood wash away from them. I didn’t mean to do it I swear. It was all a spur of the moment or was it?

 His harsh words rang in my mind and my blood started to boil again. Lips pressed in a thin line my head whipped to the side, images of his hands violently abusing my body. Pots and pans flying everywhere, mindless cursing and death glares. It had been an hour and a petty argument about towels on the bathroom floor took an ugly and gruesome turn. I didn’t fight back until a particularly hard throw towards the furnace made my head jerk back and hit on the mantle piece. Pressing my hand against my head I felt warm liquid trickle in between my fingers and onto the nape of my neck.

I watched Ryan from the corner of my eye take another step towards me and that got the gears in my head turning. Grabbing the nearest rod to turn the burning logs in the fireplace I hit him on his legs with all the force I could muster up after being beaten to pulp an hour straight. My eyes snapped open upon hearing an ear piercing shriek and a thud on the wooden floor. There he was writhing in pain, leg turning blue. Gathering up my senses I hoisted myself up using the metal rod in my hand. Lost in agony Ryan was oblivious to the stance I had taken behind him, grip strong on the tool in my hand.

The years of pain, constant nagging, endless fights, sleepless nights, incessant mornings of waking up with a sore body, swollen eyes and before I knew my hands were up in the air swinging the rod with full vigour and smashing the back of my sweet little husband’s head. Eyes widened, breaths got heavier and I could hear my heart beating in my ears. I fell to the floor realising what I had done, frantically trying to wake Ryan up. Horror flashed before my eyes holding my shaking bloody hands in front of my face. Seeing that it was too late I ran to my room grabbed my already packed bag and made a run out of the house, without a second glance.

 The distant sound of the police siren nearing my region of rest broke me out of my trance, disrupting my train of thought. Standing up, I lazily made my way to the bus approaching the bus stop opposite to the cliff. Placing my hand on the metal support, one foot on the bus step I glanced back to the place of poignant memories, the one I was ready to leave behind and start afresh. Feeling as if a weight had been lifted off my shoulders, I hopped on the bus light heartedly, with a smug grin on my face, content with how the chain of events in my life came to a satisfied end. Oh wait? Did I say the end? Sigh, if only my dearest friend, if only that was the case!

The Grim Reaper

The beeping of the monitor started slowing down

And I felt mother's pull on my hospital gown.

Suddenly the room started to get dizzy,

And in a flash my friend, the world felt heavy!

It felt as if the penultimate stage of my illness alas! got to me,

Those endless years of hoping to be free

Seemed pointless,

As I felt my soul waiting,

Waiting to just escape and flee.

The chaos in the room started to fade away,

The nurse frantically searching for tools on the doctor's tray.

"You'll be fine, just keep your eyes open", she said

Little did she know my friend, hope was long gone 

And the disease just wanted me to slip away in the hands of death.

The incessant wailing of my mother stopped,

Her pleas wanting the doctor to circumvent me from dying 

Seemed a little far fetched given my state.

Haltingly sleeping to begin again on the other side 

I sighed a happy smile, feeling the pain subside,

The thread between life and death 

Finally untied! 

The Dowager

She sat at the edge of the board walk with feet dipped ankle high in the water, eyes staring out to the ripples created  by the mid morning sun in the sea green ocean water. Her mind wandered back to the poignant memories she shared with him. 

"Kindly read your vows", announced the priest out loud. A grin appeared on my face when the man I loved whole heartedly stood fumbling with a paper in his shaking hands in front of me. Clearing his throat he began, "I remember the day we first bumped into each other in that cafe. I swear you were the most beautiful girl I had ever laid eyes on. I found myself staring at you lost in some kind of a trance while you explained with that adorable panic in your voice of how you weren't looking where you were going before you spilled your coffee all over me". She smiled recalling that day.

"So here's to all the things that wound us up in this state today, you in a white dress and me wondering how in the whole world did I ever get so lucky to have you by my side. Right here, right now I ask you to be my peace as we journey together on this wonderful path. I want you to be my escape, my home and your plain simple self to balance this crazy thing called life that would happen to us, bringing with it the many ups and downs that we get to face together. I promise to cherish you for the rest of my life and to hold you today and for eternity, to protect your delicate self when the going gets a little too tough". I noticed as his eyes started to get glossy. "I just..", he chuckled "I'm just so in love with you". I let out a watery laugh myself. From my peripheral view I saw the audience of the church gape lovingly at us and a few women dabbing their face with a tissue to circumvent the tears from falling.

A tap on the shoulder interrupted her train of thought. "We're ready to go", said her daughter, the first to the break the sad silence the woman was reminiscing in. Arriving at their destination and taking a deep breath they walked towards the crowd of people gathered in the middle of the enclosed ground. 

She watched the casket being lowered into the ground with numbness surrounding her. As the last rites were read out and everyone left, she sat near his grave mindlessly brushing her fingers on the grave that read "I promise to hold you forever and always; Tom Landon, September 1931- May 2015". Getting up and brushing the dust off her clothes while smiling at the memory a barely audible 'Forvever and Always' was whispered before she turned and walked away. 

The Heartbreak Kid

I should've seen it coming from a mile away,

The day you left me and walked the other way.

I just asked a simple question didn't I? The moment we blossomed and you said;

"Of course! I would never do that to you"

Oh how my face changed several hues,

Before it set on the crimson red that my cheeks blushed,

And your 'I would always love you' came out a little hushed.

I should've taken that as a sign of your hesitation of commitment towards me,

But I was too blinded by my love for you, to open my heart and mind to see.

So I ask out loud again;

"If I break along the way would you help me pick up my shattered pieces or would you walk away"? 

I got my answer as clear as day,

The day you left me to walk the other way. 

The Nightmare

I see you,

Haunting me in my dreams.

Making me feel uneasy by walking down the hall,

I just want to wake up is all.

Tell myself this is a dream 

But what can I do when it's all real,

The mystery in your eyes ever so surreal.

I try to stop her from getting to me 

And run out in the backyard,

But I see her follow me from the corner of my eye. 

She pulls me back with a sudden jerk 

The collar of my shirt feeling like a noose around my neck.

I try to grab something

Nothing but air lingers and slips through my fingers.

I fall to the ground with a jolt 

And I look over my  shoulder to see not a soul.

I dust off the grass from my clothes 

And start towards my house 

I see you 

Haunting me in my dreams 

I see your feet dangling from my tree 

I've forgotten really,

The difference between dreams and reality 

My nightmare begins all over again. 

The Solitary Soul

She has no one left now

Just a lonely little soul, a lonely little someone.

She looked back but never regretted anything she did

The mistakes she made

The habits she took in,

The fall she had on her way to reach where she was

‘But does it really matter now’? She asked herself

But little did she know that the answer lay within!

Beneath the fake smile, beneath the darkness of her soul

Beneath who she really was.

She lay there on her death bed

Thinking of what went wrong,

Had she got what she deserved?

No one left to love.

Well, who knew that the answer lay within.

Come Back Soon

With piles of crusty socks, the old cereal bowls of curdled milk and the mildewed towels, thirteen year old Mary's room looked as if a tornado had passed through and smelled of everything but cleanliness. Mary, on hearing her mother’s footsteps got worried about the state her room was in and quickly rolled her jackets and shirts and stashed them in her cupboard, as she was already given warnings by her mother at umpteen occasions.

‘Messy room’ was the something that got Mary’s mother, Mrs. Lockwood, agitated and rolling her eyes in frustration. “Mary, how many times have I told you to clean up your room?” On opening her cupboard all her clothes fell on the floor.  Mrs. Lockwood became red with anger and screamed at Mary who literally hid under her blanket. “Mary Lockwood, you filthy girl” “You will make up for your messy room.”  “But mom, why do you always torture me like this, says Mary”?  “I do not want to hear anything from you.  No watching TV and going out with friends for a month.”

 And there stood Mrs. Lockwood staring at the room. She slowly walked towards the cupboard took out the fungus strewn clothes, re-folded them and kept them back in their place. She glanced at the room and her daughter one last time and while going out, said “I’ll come back soon” and with this she closed the door behind her. After her exit from the room rats and cockroaches scuttled out of their homes and started nibbling on the torn bed sheets and the stale food on the floor and everywhere else in the room.

The stench of the room went out through the window’s crack into the garden and mixed with the fragrance of the white flowers.  Right next to the garden, were two men helping Mrs. Lockwood into a white colored van. The van’s body read, ‘Holby City Mental Hospital’. Mrs. Lockwood waved goodbye as the van drove away.  Mary’s mother was suffering from mental illness for the last 15 years, but she would visit her home once a year and have a scuffle with Mary on the state of her room.

The Premonition

I just could not concentrate. The slightest movement would throw me off my work. It was way past my work time and the stock of files on my desk just kept piling on. The 'tick-toc' coming from the wall clock felt like a time bomb, about to burst! And it actually did. The first 'burst' came from my boss's office. He was shouting at one of my colleagues and I knew in no time I would be standing in that room. I could feel the unpleasantness spread in my cubicle. The noises coming from the photocopy machines stopped. The droplets of water of my now luke cold water slipping down the side of the glass started making me nervous. Beads of sweat formed on my forehead sliding down the side of my visage.  The vibration of my phone made me jump in my seat and the screen flashed yet another missed call from my mother who I figured would be the second one to chide me for not telling her about my whereabouts. I'm not your regular stay at home kind of person and the constant outings made my mother paranoid and hence the calls, every hour, once my usual office hours are over. I was concentrating hard to put all the details I could in an SMS to my mother. Curse these phones for a word limit. The screaming stopped and for a moment so did my heart. I heard my boss call my name.

The 5 second walk to his office felt like an hour. I was already having a bad day and was ready for any punch he had to throw my way. Apparently the man was being shouted at because he made me stay up late for work that was not so important. Great! I cursed under my breath, packed my things and left. I was feeling a bit uneasy walking through the empty hallway of the office and what baffled me further was the uncanny breeze making my hair brush against my forehead within these closed 4 walls. Feeling as though someone was following me I came to an abrupt stop and quickly turned to find that the glass door that I had earlier locked, opening slowly and then slam shut with a violent jerk. Scared out of my wits I mindlessly began to press the elevator’s button wanting to get out of the building more than ever. Impatiently, I kept stealing glances at the elevator’s light that was moving at a painfully slow rate to reach the parking level. Watching that horror movie last night did not help my state as I stared at the elevator’s doors open, silently praying that there is no surprise waiting for me on the other side. I was partially relieved when I found myself standing in a vacant parking lot and my anxiousness grew as I approached my car. I suddenly came to a stop when an eerie breeze made the hair from my back fall on my shoulder as though someone rushed past by me. Immediately I dashed towards my car and heaved a sigh of relieve once I was seated in it with the seat belt on. Too scared to call mom because post her 7 missed calls, the message I was to send was still in my 'drafts' - I called my dad instead.

It was late so I wasn't expecting much traffic. I put the key in the ignition and the engine growled three times, 'feel again' by The Script was playing on my system. I set the back view mirror when it happened. On turning back my face turned as white as snow not being able to believe what sat in front of my eyes. Scared out of my wits I sat there frozen! I started to reach for the door handle but was paralyzed with my hand jammed in one place. My heart began to pump hard as if it would pop right out of my chest when the figure with the hollow eyes slowly began to scratch its long nails down my back. My 10:45 alarm went off and my phone began to violently vibrate. My eyes jerked open a second later to find my hands on the steering wheel and heavily breathing I realized that I had fallen asleep in my car. I turned around to check for reassurance and let out a breath I didn't know I was even holding and on turning my back my gaze fell upon the clock which read 10:44 when my car door creaked open. My eyes widened. My breathed hitched. I went numb. 

World of War

                                                                      

“Wake up soldier. Wake up!” These were the last words I could hear before I let go of the rope that was pulling me up from in between the gorge. I splashed into the river below and hit my head on the bottom. I could see bubbles of my blood mixing with the sunlight and shining. It was beautiful. As I slowly slipped into a state of unconsciousness, you know the last thing that went through my mind? Coins! It struck me, that I’m a coin, minted by the US Army. I am cleansed and stamped with just one thought in my mind – to serve and protect my country no matter what the consequences.

Before I wound up in my present state, I was fighting a sudden infiltration in the army base. The guerrilla tactics were of no use because I had to circumvent losing any more of my fellow soldiers for we had already lost about a 100 and still counting. The computer room was under siege, passwords, defense plans and all the vital information about our base camp were compromised. While pulling another soldier of mine to safety is when I was shot at, this led to, me stumbling in the gorge. As I lay in the water, semi conscious, suddenly a hand took me by the collar of my jacket and pulled me up. It was Sergeant Roger Hendricks. He was assisting me to my office when the base was suddenly attacked.

He made several attempts to revive my heart. I could feel his hands pressing against my chest and in a flash the world felt heavy. But the rest, the rest was on me. It was my choice whether I give up or keep on battling for my life. As my mouth started to cough out more blood, my body began to quiver and a chill ran through my spine. Death was nigh. My feet became cold and my brain haltingly froze and with one of the best soldiers by my side, I decided to give up. What could I do? I just didn't want to wake up, for my life was not meant to be wasted in a world full of war. So, I lay there in excruciating pain, calmly being given away in the hands of death. I... I was at peace!