Walking down the damp leaf strewn path, the wind blowing the
hair off my shoulder, I let the rain slip through my fingers. Clinging the coat
tighter to my body, I reached the mountain end, my get away that overlooked the
city. Sitting on the metal bench a shiver ran down my spine, the cold, bone
chilling. Leaning forward I took out my hands from the warm confines of my
jacket. I watched the rain hitting harder and red near my feet mixing with
muddy water falling off the cliff. Turning my hands in the air I let the blood
wash away from them. I didn’t mean to do it I swear. It was all a spur of the
moment or was it?
His harsh words rang
in my mind and my blood started to boil again. Lips pressed in a thin line my
head whipped to the side, images of his hands violently abusing my body. Pots
and pans flying everywhere, mindless cursing and death glares. It had been an
hour and a petty argument about towels on the bathroom floor took an ugly and
gruesome turn. I didn’t fight back until a particularly hard throw towards the
furnace made my head jerk back and hit on the mantle piece. Pressing my hand
against my head I felt warm liquid trickle in between my fingers and onto the
nape of my neck.
I watched Ryan from the corner of my eye take another step
towards me and that got the gears in my head turning. Grabbing the nearest rod
to turn the burning logs in the fireplace I hit him on his legs with all the
force I could muster up after being beaten to pulp an hour straight. My eyes
snapped open upon hearing an ear piercing shriek and a thud on the wooden
floor. There he was writhing in pain, leg turning blue. Gathering up my senses
I hoisted myself up using the metal rod in my hand. Lost in agony Ryan was
oblivious to the stance I had taken behind him, grip strong on the tool in my
hand.
The years of pain, constant nagging, endless fights,
sleepless nights, incessant mornings of waking up with a sore body, swollen
eyes and before I knew my hands were up in the air swinging the rod with full
vigour and smashing the back of my sweet little husband’s head. Eyes widened,
breaths got heavier and I could hear my heart beating in my ears. I fell to the
floor realising what I had done, frantically trying to wake Ryan up. Horror
flashed before my eyes holding my shaking bloody hands in front of my face.
Seeing that it was too late I ran to my room grabbed my already packed bag and
made a run out of the house, without a second glance.
The distant sound of
the police siren nearing my region of rest broke me out of my trance,
disrupting my train of thought. Standing up, I lazily made my way to the bus
approaching the bus stop opposite to the cliff. Placing my hand on the metal
support, one foot on the bus step I glanced back to the place of poignant memories,
the one I was ready to leave behind and start afresh. Feeling as if a weight
had been lifted off my shoulders, I hopped on the bus light heartedly, with a
smug grin on my face, content with how the chain of events in my life came to a
satisfied end. Oh wait? Did I say the end? Sigh, if only my dearest friend, if
only that was the case!
